Ranking a Decade of Disney Rides

We’re mere weeks away from the opening of Tiana’s Bayou Adventure.

At that point, a decade of Disney theme park innovations will be completed.

Disney officials are already moving forward, planning upcoming attractions like Test Track 3.0 and expansions like The Tropical Americas.

Before we look at what’s next, let’s take a moment to approach everything Disney has accomplished.

Here’s how I’d rank the 14 rides Disney theme parks have added over the past decade.

14. Alien Swirling Saucers

Longtime readers know that I have a fondness for Alien Swirling Saucers, a child-friendly ride that produces squeals of laughter.

So, you can already tell that if I’m ranking this one last, Disney has had an exceptionally good decade.

The genius of Alien Swirling Saucers is that somebody idly wondered, “How can we make Mad Tea Party more violent?”

Then, Disney did just that, and it really works as a raucous, family-friendly ride that will leave you bruised, battered, and giggling uncontrollably.

13. Snow White’s Enchanted Wish

Since its inception, Snow White’s Scary Adventures proved an odd take on the beloved film.

The third-person perspective confused guests, as did the lack of Snow White.

People didn’t understand you were watching the story as if you were Snow White experiencing it for the first time.

And one of the cardinal rules of storytelling is that you have to explain something, you didn’t tell it well.

In 2021, Disney modestly re-themed the attraction to make it more upbeat.

The new version focuses on Snow White earning her long overdue happily ever after.

That’s lovely, but Enchanted Wish is really just a modest overlay of an existing ride.

12. WEBSLINGERS: A Spider-Man Adventure

I honestly don’t know how to rank this one, but it feels wrong to put it into the top ten.

If you don’t know, Disney has updated the Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin ride to add some Marvel touches.

Internationally, you’ll find Ant-Man & The Wasp: Nano Battle!, which is largely the same attraction as WEBSLINGERS.

You use new technology to interact with these games in a way that draws you into the action even more.

The whole thing is pure joy, but it’s just a shiny new coat of paint on a decades-old ride.

11. Na’vi River Journey

I’m of two minds on this particular ranking.

If I slotted Na’vi River Journey where I felt it belonged, you’d mail me upside-down Mickey Ears with a knife stuck in the middle.

I definitely hold a contrarian opinion on Na’vi River Journey, which I feel embodies the storytelling of Avatar better than its sibling.

There’s a philosophical concept known as the Dark Forest that plays an integral role in The Three-Body Problem book trilogy.

This attraction details the perils of living in a dark forest, never quite knowing whether you’re predator or prey.

That’s a decidedly high (and dark) concept for Disney, and I delight in its depth and nuance.

Alas, most people think of it as the boring Avatar boat ride.

So, I mutter under my breath about pearls before swine when discussing this one.

But again, not even ten percent of Disney fans would side with me here.

10. Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run

On the one hand, this is just a retrofitted Star Tours where the “cockpit” is a much smaller movie theater.

On the other hand, Disney has gamified the experience such that there’s a competitive element. People take it seriously, too.

I had to laugh the other day when I read someone complaining that Smugglers Run needs an age requirement.

Apparently, some child had acted as the pilot and performed…as you’d expect for a person ten years away from their driver’s license.

So, a fully grown adult was irritated that they’d stood in line for an hour just for the Millennium Falcon to crash into every wall.

That’s how much people care about the immersion of this attraction.

When they score poorly, they feel like they’ve let down Rey and Chewie. And that says everything about the joy of this ride.

9. Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure

In a weird way, this ride belongs at Toy Story Land.

I say this because Ratatouille shrinks guests down to a small size, just as occurs at Toy Story Land.

This experience strikes me as a better version of the idea than the rides at that themed land. It’s a more cohesive implementation.

Also, Disney deserves credit for telling a charming story that runs parallel to the movie’s events.

You enter the world of Ratatouille, learn what it’s like to feel like a rat in a kitchen, and then take over the joint in the end.

I don’t use the word “madcap” very often, but that’s the best way to describe Ratatouille at EPCOT.

8. Slinky Dog Dash

I want to rank this roller coaster higher, as I think it’s absolutely perfect for what it does.

Imagineers aimed high here by teaching the practical applications of physics at a theme park attraction.

Fittingly, that’s also what the slinky attempts to do as a toy, although I’m dubious that most kids have realized that over the years.

Anyway, the stretching and contracting elements of Slinky Dog Dash induce euphoria, and that stop/start in the middle is exquisite.

7. Frozen Ever After

In terms of getting the spirit of the story correct, this is a top-five attraction.

Just like in the movie, everything builds to Elsa’s jaw-dropping rendition of “Let It Go.”

Of course, much more happens before and after, and I quite like the ride’s sense of humor.

Of course, Sven would get his tongue stuck on a block of ice!

Little touches like that warm my heart and make Frozen a masterpiece. It would probably make my personal top three.

6. Tron Lightcycle / Run

You may be surprised by the rankings for Slinky Dog Dash and Tron, but it’s the same reason for both.

I don’t want a ride to end in two minutes or less. Honestly, that sort of ride design drives me to distraction.

Add more track and satisfy your guests for a longer period, Disney! We’re standing in these lines for hours!

Obviously, this is a quibble, though. Overall, Tron represents the culmination of decades of fans’ hopes and prayers answered.

The visually stimulating films come to life at Magic Kingdom, and I could pretty much live in this building. It’s that resplendent to me.

5. Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind

I’m a sucker for any attraction that offers multiple experiences.

Star Tours blew my mind when Disney started mixing the scenes so that every ride was different.

At Cosmic Rewind, you’re never quite sure which song will provide the soundtrack for your interstellar journey.

In my experience, odds are like 90 percent that it’ll be I Ran by Flock of Seagulls, but I’m just falling victim to the luck of the draw.

Anyway, Disney has done a marvelous job in world-building here. The Wonders of Xandar pavilion sets the tone for the ride.

Then, that floor-to-ceiling monitor shows the Guardians of the Galaxy and the dread Celestial trying to destroy us all.

Disney accentuates the size of the rooms to provide a sense of scale. It’ll make you feel tiny, as you should when facing a Celestial.

Then, the ride provides any number of thrills, most memorably that moment when you realize you’re descending from orbit.

Hurtling at a high velocity toward an unwelcoming planet will definitely get your blood pumping!

4. Avatar Flight of Passage

I wanted to rank it higher. I know that you want me to rank it higher. Honestly, I just couldn’t do it, though.

The other overlays have consistently ranked lower on this list, and that’s all Avatar Flight of Passage is.

Imagineers have created the co-called Soarin’ on Steroids ride experience, and it’s memorable because of the Pandoran setting.

The takeoff, pause in the middle, and landing are especially memorable, as is the color on display throughout the ride.

Disney understands that a James Cameron attraction must be visually stunning, and Flight of Passage definitely checks that box.

Still, I’m not convinced it’s anything more than an 8K take on Soarin’, the ride I prefer in a vacuum.

(Here come the upside-down Mickey Ears with knives in them…)

3. Seven Dwarfs Mine Train

I’m sneaking this one in at the buzzer, as Seven Dwarfs Mine Train officially turns ten on May 28^th, 2024.

The roller coaster’s presence here underscores just how much has occurred at Disney’s American theme parks in just a decade.

All 14 attractions I’ve listed here represent the pinnacle of Imagineering, yet we’re getting them at a pace of 1.4 rides per year.

Seven Dwarfs Mine Train (SDMT) is the one where Disney raised its game, with Imagineers boldly combining a roller coaster with a dark ride.

The results speak for themselves, as does the attraction’s sustained popularity.

For the body of a decade now, SDMT has required the longest wait at Magic Kingdom.

That’s a borderline unprecedented level of dominance for the world’s most trafficked theme park.

2. Mickey & Minnie’s Runaway Railway

Again, I grade ride re-themes on a tougher curve than the entirely new creations.

So, the fact that I’ve ranked Runaway Railway this high speaks volumes about how much I admire the attraction.

Disney took the existing structure of The Great Movie Ride and turned it into an entirely different experience.

Now, a trackless ride vehicle carries guests into numerous cartoon settings, and the digital displays produce a frenzy of activity.

At some point, I recommend watching one place on the wall for the entire experience.

You’ll realize just how vibrant each story is. With so much happening, every room possesses countless toonish gags.

This ride would have warmed Walt Disney’s heart and allowed him to fully appreciate Imagineering’s growth over the decades.

1. Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance

When the Tron coaster arrived, everyone knew the bar it had to clear.

For five years now, Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance has claimed the throne as Disney’s best ride.

While Tron had a chance to top it, you can tell from these rankings that I don’t feel it did…or was really that close. 

In truth, that would have been an amazing feat. Rise of the Resistance is airport hangar-sized and brimming with E-ticket features.

Disney has taken some of the most popular theme park rides ever and jammed about five of them together in one experience.

The results speak for themselves, with Rise of the Resistance delivering the most immersive theme park experience ever.

I don’t even like Star Wars, yet I make a beeline here the instant Disney’s Hollywood Studios opens.

Rise of the Resistance is that good.

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